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Mice Net : August 2008
comedy of errors Several years ago I was producing a client’s 25th gala dinner up in the Blue Mountains. In order to save costs, I’d agreed to pick up the “talent” (and I use the word lightly) at Sydney airport as he’d flown in from Melbourne and I from Albury from a previous event. Due to my client’s ethnic origins they wanted a particular comedian and had sourced him prior to our appointment. Their preferred comedian was unavailable so the client went with his recommendation. This guy was mildly funny on a TV show he did back in the early 90s however, when I finally found him at the airport, he was clearly sleep deprived and wired to within an inch of his life. Thus began the long drive up to the Blue Mountains. About an hour into the trip he wanted food, caffeine and, no doubt , a top up of whatever he was on. Once we arrived about 4pm he took off to his room saying he’d see me at 7.30 before his first set at 8.00pm (between entrée and main). At 7.30 we called his room and continued until 8.00. The hotel finally roused him and he wandered in bleary eyed at about 8.20. Well, this idiot finishes his set, gets off stage and starts abusing me for letting the mains out during his routine. That’s when I decided that the entertainment should not ever be paid more than the event organiser! time Waits for no trainer An efficiency and time management conference for a national supermarket chain was due to start at 7.30am with a presentation from a trainer from a national training company. Unfortunately, the trainer didn’t show up until 8.50am, and rather than apologise, had a go at the delegates for being early. The trainer chased delegates out of the room so that she could set up her presentation. During this time she realised that she had forgotten her training manuals, and so asked hotel staff to print them for her within 20 minutes. At 128 pages in size, spiral bound, and refusing to unbind her original, the photocopying took one-and-a-half hours. The course finally began at 10.20am – almost two hours after it was supposed to. At the conclusion of the session the trainer asked if anyone had any questions. The organiser of the conference asked the trainer whether she, as a so-called time management expert, had ever attended the course herself. Laughter could apparently be heard throughout the venue. plied pipers A venue operator said no problem when representatives from a pipe manufacturing company said that they would organise the entertainment for their Christmas party they were holding at the hotel. When the hotel meetings and events manager asked what type they could expect the client said it would be a bit of music and a bit of dancing from some of the guests. As the night progressed and the cue was given the “office girls” who were sitting with other guests made their way to the dance floor where they stripped off and did what they were paid to do… with one another no less. Our venue informant tells us that beverage sales on the night were triple what was expected. 68 mice.net